Saturday, October 30, 2004

Unholy curses : (but still) Divine Meditations

Currently stuck in a monopoly game
where the player has disconnected, perhaps in shame.
Alas, I am left staring
at a blank screen with colours on it, left
behind, like a adolescent schoolboy,
who missed his bus. Damn, 'that bitch
is back. she's orange rated, and was only
2 minutes away from being disqualified.
Oh the bounty I would hath reaped.
if she, whom hath paid her last debt, did'st stay away.

Blest' thee, for thee art so sick of studying
I think, i might'st go crazy sometime soon.
It is sickening, that it oft occur'st that math
might even be interesting. Night and day, Day and night,
I pray. To myself, the Deitie of Political Economie.
Curst' the blasphemie, thou who created the MCQ.
A mugger's delight, such repetitive verses, go against
the wit of thee. The spheares are im'balanced, but who'st to intervene
in thy almighty word, oh Cambridge examiners. You
who stamp'st your mark, UCLES, on those papers.
That determinst our fate, til the Angells' bloweth their bugles.

As you can see, i'm 'deed
bored out of my wit
Call me crazy for writing this shit
One day, perchance, this might live in infamie.
Think van gogh.
and this gibberish of mine
may one day be Canoniz'd

mervyn at 10/30/2004 08:39:00 PM

Friday, October 29, 2004

you could get cancer.

hi, its late. really late. and since its a friday, im partaying away. yeah. the truth is, i've screwed up my bio clock and i know not what is day and what is night. ok i know what night is, but i dunno the day. but im going to bed soon.

anyway, after much careful deliberation i've finally come up with my ideal girl. or at least the physical appearances. my ideal girl would be... fair. how fair? erm not too fair til it looks sickly, or like porcelain, but fair, like song seung hyun. ha. that fair. and then she'd have to have toned arms. why? i don't know why. how toned? not too muscular, but toned enough. not too bulky either. not too thin. and then she'd have to have a good pair of shoulders. nice collarbones. like erm, i don't know. u know, not too prominent, but yet, just a gentle, subtle hint. like a piece of art. then she'd have pink lips. a straight set of teeth. and she'll have shoulder-length hair. done in a ponytail. nice. and she'd be petite, not too tall, around 165 would be good. and what else? ah yes, the look. that look. don't ask me what look. just that look. and she'd be a goddess. so, to indulge in my misogynous fantasies, pls do dress up like that. some things, u can replicate, other things, out.

and then, the latest trend to hit the streets. mugging. and soon it'll all be over. like the torrential rains of november. come and gone. and the whole place will be wet. with the tears of joy. anyway, may i urge everyone to pls keep your worksheets and stuff which you do your math workings or any other kinda workings on, i'm starting a revolution. lets burn them in a huge bonfire after the as are over and done with. it'd be the most exciting piece of life we'll have ever witnessed since a long time ago. yes. life.

come and gone.
all too soon.
and we spend a third of our life (8/24 hours = 1/3 day. life = n Days = n/3 Days. life = n/3 days / n = 1/3) sleeping. what a waste of life.
with that, i bid you goodnight,
for im going to sleep.

mervyn at 10/29/2004 08:33:00 PM

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

the long awaited post

hi blog, after a long absence, i am back. many of you will think i have been studying, but that has taken up rather little of my time. what have i been doing you ask, well, that i'm not sure. but i guess, life has been alright.. not too bad.. but could up the tempo, so that come 11 nov, it's ALL SYSTEMS GO. why not 4 nov u ask, cos 4 nov is already READY FOR TAKEOFF. besides, its just gp. im busy mugging literature and math actually, havent really started with econs and history. how ironic, when i'm going to dump literature after my a's. well not exactly dump, i'd still possess the skills needed to critically appreciate a piece of literary work. just that i'm not going to be writing it down on a piece of paper and wrecking my brains to show that i can REALLY critially appraise a literary work WELL. argh...

ok so today was really fun, i had a cambridge interview for admission. fun? ok lah, not really fun, it was more of intellectually challenging and i really learned some cool stuff from the interviewer. i was supposed to prove that MR = Mc is the profit maximising position, and well ok i did it without much trouble, and the interesting part was MR is half of AR. that's really interesting. couldnt really do it, was kinda stuck, like u know like the people on who wanna be a millionaire kinda thing, and this was apparently the 64,000 question. but i did it in the end with a little prompting, and by god i was so amazed that i could do it because it never occured to me that there was such strong mathematical proof underlying this simple, basic, assumption which i always held. wow, looks like i'll be enjoying econs in uni if its gonna be more of such stuff. and then he asked me to discuss my "interesting factors on investment model" but to the best of my ability, i couldnt remember what nonsense i uttered in the application form, so i came up with this rate of change of profits in the long run thing and by god, i was really impressed with the substance of my jibberish cos it kinda made sense when i really didnt know what i was talking. and he said, wow, did u come up with that in a sort of a project or just on your own or some school work, and i bluffed him that haahaa i came up with it in class when i came up with it in front of him... i was scared out of my balls when he mentioned that he'd be coming round to the investment thing at the start. so that was pretty interesting, but oh wells.

so now im just lazing around and going to study more donne soon.. anyway i was in the bath just now and i thought, some people try to time travel, hurry things and all. and the very fact of it is that it is going against the very nature of humans. think of it this way, our life is like a musical score, a piece, a melody. and our heartbeat is the metronome. so it goes ta-thud instead of the piano tick tock tick tock right? and some parts we're required to play it fast, some parts we're required to play it slow, just like a musical piece right, some parts are legato and some parts are i dunno what the term is lah. cos i dun study piano, but that's besides the point. so u see, some people try to rush things, try to do things which are against the score, and dun follow the metronome, and it ruins the whole musical tune. in essense, well yes there's nothing wrong with rewriting the score, people should actually rewrite their tune, but it should still fit somewhere in the whole musical collection right? the suite or something.. its so weird if in beethoven's nocturnes you suddenly get a sonata. so we should lead our life by the metronome and not do unnatural things. just like the musicians' music were shaped by their era(romatics, classicalists whatever) , so our lives are shaped by our era. and we should not try to hasten our lives, or hasten our actions or whatever.
so what's my point of saying all this?
no point actually.

i'm a great philospoher. one day, you all will be learning mervynism.
i am a great philospoher prone to spelling errors (it rhymes!)
notice the plosive alliteration. too much literature.


mervyn at 10/27/2004 03:35:00 PM

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

i'm mervyn tan, and i'm reporting for duty.

so. what do you know, yours truly has received the letter of enlistment which is the due of every young, nubile, singaporean male, who gets drafted into the guarded regimentation of the singapore armed forces when we are in our prime, the best years of our life. i suspect this may be to reduce the rate of teenage pregnancies, or perhaps to build up the carnal desires in every young male in order that they may unleash the force of their wrath for a higher success rate. who knows what these government policy planners are up to anyway. oh well but either way, i'll lose my coveted pink ic on the 6th jan. damn. and my green ic photo looks kinda disgusting. but who cares. the green ic is stupid man.. makes one lose their sense of identity and dignity. what, are they afraid that army men holding pink ics will portray a gay image and green is the way to go? or are they afraid that in the forests we'll bring out our pink ics and lose it and pay a hefty sum for replacement to the ica and they want the replacement fee to go to the saf instead so they give out their own ics? ah who cares.

anyway ytd was like some grad ceremony in sch but i felt it was just a waste of time with all that photo taking and speeches and all. what are photos if not for just some physical expression of memories, but in the first place, it is entirely reductive. who can cram a smorgasboard of memrories and emotions into a single photograph man.. but who cares lah. so after sch went with ahlam to make a visa mini and set up the uob acct, and those class cocks went to watch wimbledon or something but i didnt join them in the end cos it was too rushed and wimbledon isnt my cup of tea anyway. the nasa team also brought along an alien with them so the class cocks deserted the nasa team. damn, the nasa team has achieved the holy grail of all space expeditions. contact with a alien form. hahaha...

anyway i hope time speeds up but not so fast, at least like let me learn al the stuff i need to first.

got more to say, but im lazy. so screw it.

anyway, what are the odds i'll be found on one of those parties? we'll see how things turn out, but i wont be so free to be on them for the sole purpose of opposing the status quo. but we all disagree with the status quo anyway. but opposition politicians are such a disgrace in the political scene, taking so extreme a stand (like steve chia in today's parliament) and doing really stupid things. like chee. ok bye.

mervyn at 10/19/2004 06:41:00 PM

Thursday, October 14, 2004

friendly alliances

hi. so there has been numerous updates from numerous people on the Last Day of School and i feel obliged to give my three cents worth (other people only have two cents, but i earn more.)
so yesterday was the last day of lessons, but our graduation nonsense is on monday so screw it. well, i went to school not even feeling like it was the last day of lessons and that i wont be seeing all the jackasses in school ever again. i went to school like it was a drag.. so dreary and "aw a muddle." it indeed is a muddle when school's so boring and nothing new is being taught. i didnt get the feeling of inseperability, or a sense of nostalgia at the good times spent in school. because nothing was normal in school at all. we weren't in our usual classes, didnt do our usual tihngs. how can one expect to have a sense of nostalgia like that. furthermore, it didn't even feel like school. the canteens were as empty as saddam hussain's jail cell. but ah who cares. who even gives a damn that its our last year of uniformed schooling or that we wont see many of those people ever again? i don't. cos those that you wanna see, you'll see no matter what. those that you don't wanna see, and have good reason for not wanting to see them, should just die, or burn in hell.
but i regretted not playing a myriad of pranks on people who will have no chance for revenge. but the frogs were good. ha. serves her right for always being so irritating in lectures and irritating the balls out of me with her stupid looks.
damn, im a bitch.

well, so today i completed my cycle of driving lessons and lo and behold oh balls i have to wait 2.5 months for the bleeding driving test, so i'm taking it on 23 dec. damn, that's long, but at least i'll have my license by christmas. more time to stay alive i guess. hahaha..

well, i'm not really the kind who goes around talking about all those who have made my life nice in jc, but you know who you are, and you know what i'll say. so thanks to everyone for making the ballsy times of class more enjoyable. and no thanks to the nasa team for wasting a few weeks of my time (i think that's what it would come to if it were added together) thanks also to certain people who make me realise why there's hope for opposition parties. and maybe 30 years later history source based students doing the pol development of sg will have to answer the question "the opposition never won the elections. the pap merely lost it!" hahaha. what crap i am.

oh screw it. i hate talking about my school life. but i'll read what there is given to me on monday and update again.

watching the presidential debates now. so ok bye.
i think kerry will win. bets?

mervyn at 10/14/2004 06:40:00 PM

Sunday, October 10, 2004

the fool's game.

hi, so what's been up. it has been an emotional week for the singapore idols, as they get kicked out one by one, and nobody expects the votes. damn. either singaporeans are tone deaf, or jerry ong has really really really rich friends. or maybe he's just really really rich himself. and singapore girls are a real superficial lot cos they vote for the handsome guys and not the ones who sound good. anyway i gather most of the voters are young innocent little girls with too much time on their hands and wasting their parents money. i could be really rich if i could just get all of them to tell me who they wanna vote for and i just cancel out all the excess votes that cancel out each other and then i just vote the extra votes in. ha. ok whatever.

so life has been rather fine, finally studying abit, driving abit. oh well. u win some, u lose some. but school's in tomorrow again and its such a bitch to have to go back to school. i mean, school is so useless we don't really learn much from it. i mean, mark lo can pretty much send all the outlines by post to our houses, chua can smile and smile and smile to herself in the mirror, glee can go thru drq and case studies online, and viggynesh can rant to herself on some random blog and we'll just glance at it when we're free. oh ya, and math chua can go and teach her nasa team their complicated math solutionsn whilst i stay home and mug tys. see, effectively i have cut out so many periods and we can cram the remaining periods into one day. hope the teachers don't see this and take this as offensive, but it's just true man. really, time spent at home is so much more productive. (yeah, eating, sleeping, watching tv. the life.)

u know some people are like stupid beyond balls sense? like they go for endless consultations and all that nonsense but in the end their grades still suck. its like they go just for the sake of pleasing the teacher and trying to prove to the teacher that they're hardworking. well balls, if you were hardworking, u wouldnt need to bug the teacher with so many out of class lessons to learn what has been already been taught in class whilst playing around in class all the time and talking and going to the toilets and what not. ok maybe it's kinda obvious but who cares. ah i'm such a bitch. i must be nicer. to my classmates that i'm not gonna see for good in a few days time. not until the A's at least. but who cares about them. ok whatever i'm just bitching cos all that pent up stress from studying too much has driven me crazy. ok bye.
i'm mad

mervyn at 10/10/2004 04:18:00 PM

Thursday, October 07, 2004

melodic interlude

hi blog. so what's been up man. so today was a stay home thursday, because school was not functioning properly for us 2nd year smart students. so i stayed home and did math, read abit of hard times, read some really really dry econs s book which makes little sense for ordinary mortals, but to me, it does make a little sense. but it is really oddly phrased. dumb language.

so i really did slack around the place. but aiya i dunno.. like its the first gear now dun need to drag gear and go directly to third gear. must relaxing lah. anyway if bingssss is correct, my prelims got BBBDD. the extra D for distinction. yay!~~!!! but then i feel kinda doubtful of myself. like i dun really believe i can get a distinction... like i thought i didn't do too well for the paper at all cos i really studied not too much (by my standards) and glee even told brudder tt i did better than the science cocks, which is quite surprising. ok lah i didnt expect myself to beat muggers like pradip but then pradip doesnt turn up for s paper lessons and is probably lost in his economic theory books, and we all know how detached theory is from reality. but i think there's room for improvement yet and i certainly hope i managed to catch up on all the econs s things and get myself an a level distinction. then i will be happy. and 4 As. then i will be happier. and then i get into OCS. then i will be happiest. and then i get into LSE. i will be ecstatic. if not, i will die.

today's driving was alright in the afternoon, but the instructor at night was such a useless bum. i wanna complain against him already. when i'm free i will send a letter. screwballs man. but i'm at stage 3, which is a good thing. and i have like 8 more subjects only so its cool. think i can book for test like next friday already!! yay~~~.... ok whatever man.

yea balls off to read more econs s so i can improve. maybe abit of history too. life is an upward slope of constant strife and improvement and we have to strive on to attain greater heights. only then can we reach the pinnacle of success and maximise life. otherwise, life will be wasted. ok who cares. bye.

mervyn at 10/07/2004 06:26:00 PM

Tuesday, October 05, 2004


hi, its late, but that's my life. so packed with things to do. if only we didn't have to go to school and attend stupid dumb crap math tutorial which is a serious waste of time thanks to the stupid nasa team spamming questions which are totally idiotic and miss chua's insistence on the class going at the same pace. now think about it, it's like a learner driver. if at a junction, i am slow, i'm holding up all the cars behind me. so what do i do? i practise and move fast. i don't insist that the cars keep waiting for me. besides, i only go onto the main road after i have enough practise. these jokers are up to after prelims and still asking stupid questions and ms chua is just wasting the time of the rest of us. which is so impractical. damn. so boring.

and they should just cut out break and lunch and dun waste our bloody time. school is just such a disruption in the schedule. no wonder ppl pon school.

anyway, havee u ever gotten the feeling that some ppl in ur life exists the same way those baddies in tv serials do?? like they are so mean and all to the audience but then the people in the show think they r so damn good. its ppl like this tt should be exterminated. hope they fall into a drain and break their legs or something like that.

anyway today when i got home i saw this navy recruitment nonsense tt allows me to go to some navy battleship. quite cool. and they give a watch along with it. probably will go and check it out see what the nonsense is about man.

oh well, off to do some other nonsense. bye.

mervyn at 10/05/2004 06:45:00 PM

Monday, October 04, 2004


hi. so today we got back everything of the prelims.. was quite shocked when i receive whitebye's paper and so i got a B for lit. wah lau eh liike the first time in my life lah. so finally i get BBBD. sucks man the D is such a spoiler.. but nvm... and so lucky my gp essau didnt get 20 marks. ha.

ttoday's driving was quite fun. but ah who cares. i just wanna take the damn test soon.

mervyn at 10/04/2004 06:19:00 PM