Tuesday, August 29, 2006

ticking clocks

heys.
just got back from the LSE bbq. yayness, as all these activities goes along, the feeling of school is coming back. finally, we can start to forget about the army, and start to look forward to school!

it's all good. i mean, like i was just going arnd, knowing the people whom i will be seeing around school, and all that, and there're quite a large number of singaporeans who will be going to lse. hm. ok, some of them are cool, some of them are not so cool, but its all good and we've all gotta deal with it. the girls are well... the typical kinda girls. nothing fantastic. not my type at least.

oh wells, now i have sorta a sore throat from the BBQ, but its ok, it's a once in a while thing.

hm, well life in camp recently has been quite good, as in, i'm just passing each day like without any hiccups and all. but its still the same old boring stuff, but at least its better than nothing.

and that's about it all for now, i guess we'll see what happens as time goes along. i've a little way more to go for my NS liability, and after that, i'll be home free! we just can't wait for the day.

i'm quite excited about starting school again. its time to jump-start my dead engines with some economic readings. hahaha. cool.

ok that's abt it, time for bed.

mervyn at 8/29/2006 05:43:00 PM

Thursday, August 24, 2006

cities

today i was so bored in the office that i went to look through google earth.
and i noticed that different cities have different characteristics, different town planning scales. and it was very interesting to notice how different cities look so different from an aerial view.

check out the neat concentric plots which amsterdam is organised into. this is cool, and if u look closer, you'll realise that some of the lines that are running through the city are actually waterways.



next up, we take a look at london. looking at london, you sense the general orderliness within it. the very very clean lines and sharp corners, well balanced out plots of building, and it all makes for a very clean and organised city. notice also the uber long highway running through the middle of the picture. like a lifeline in the city. probably the main highway which brings people to and fro the city centre.



my personal favourite, paris. the city of love, of romance. famed for its art and fine food, the city looks as good as it sounds from the top. the neat triangles which it's all organised into, and how the triangles all form like a bigger triangle, and if u examine it closely, you can see that they're all concentrated around a circular axis. and there are more concentrations around circular axes as it spreads out, and the city is planned in such a smart and artistic way. and it just amazes me when u think how old the city actually is and who actually came up with this fine city plan.



check out california. lush greenery all around,very simple blocks of land and thats about it. but lotsa lotsa lush greenery. healthy air :)



and then its down to the down and dirty of the world, where the cities start turning bad. taking a look at tokyo, we see a totally industrialised city, where the houses are arranged like tetris blocks, in very orderly fashion, little orderly blocks scattered around. one can sense the lack of soul in the city planning.



and then we check out beijing. beijing is just a total mess, a haphazard and totally unplanned sprouting of buildings after buildings, and the logic goes that anywhere there's land, they build. and so, after numerous of development, they've got buildings, they've got skyscrapers, but its just all scattered around the place. ain't really the poster boy of city planning. must have been a negative case study for the URA.



and who can forget the mandatory national education part?
so let's take a look at how URA is doing its job.
well, the pictures speak for themselves, i leave you to draw your own conclusions.
haha.

mervyn at 8/24/2006 09:57:00 AM

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

natural beats

yo wassap around here.
i'm just surfing around the place, and i came aross this london food blog and suddenly im positively looking forward to heading over to london.

actually one of my key apprehensions about going to london is food. i'm thinking that them brits just eat junk all day. beer battered fish and chips which probably have too much batter on `em and fish that swim in oil. soggy chips. perhaps a couple of deep fried mars bars which have just been deep fried a little too much. bland chinese food. though i ain't a fan of chinese food in the first place. but whatever the case, it sure is comforting to know that yeah, good food can be had in london for good prices.

yeah, just one more month, i positively can't wait. my fingers are positively tingling with excitement and joy. so much so that i guess i can bear whatever nonsense they're throwing at me over at my workplace right now. i just have to tell myself to just shut off whatever i'm thinking and look forward to what's coming. the same way i got through the tough times in OCS. just that in OCS, u know that the instructors are doing what they do with good intentions in mind. here, that bitch of a boss is just doing what she does cos she's an overbearing, undersexed, unloved hell of a bitch. who doesn't know anything about compassion or respect for people. ah, what to do. the SAF is just filled with people like that, but she is the best example of the species. a species which is a bane to the SAF, singapore, and to the world. but then they'll rid themselves from the face of this earth soon, so it's ALL right.

ahh..
sometimes we just sit down and loook on our lives, and we think, if only. how many if only's must we live? i think life shouldn't be about if onlys, but it should be about, i should. :)

a tinge of optimism coming along? perhaps.
what's there to do but look on the bright side right.
hehe.
ok i guess i'd be off to bed at this current point of time. take care y`all, and gd night.

mervyn at 8/22/2006 03:59:00 PM

Monday, August 21, 2006

why look back when u can embrace the future

heys.
sup. i'm quite majorly tired and i'd best be off to bed soon. cos i'll wake up later in the night :) but it's all for a good cause so i'm alright.

lush beats aplenty in my room. i'm happy. haha..
went out for awhile in the evening just now. but i was quite tired so i took a cab home. and here i am, all freshened up and ready for bed. it's all good.

well, so today was just another of those days, days which are so mundane and monotonous that you wonder why such days even exist in the face of this earth. it was a day filled with sitting in front of the computer doing absolutely nothing. and frankly, it bores me. thhe army is such a great under-utiliser of resources. it kills your brains. it creates massive disillusionment and discontent amongst the youth of today. it takes away the prime of your life. yes, it's all for the nation's self defence etc etc. i'm sure it does hold a greater aim in the grand scheme of nation building, but due to the massive nature of it, the direct managers of people fail in their job, and this creates a totally useless organisation, though it was created with a grand vision.
but enough of that, i've been around long enough and soon, i'll be out of there.

anyways, sometimes, we embark on journeys which may be arduous, which may make one seem lost at times, but when we reach the grand goal of things, we look back and think, damn, that was all worth it. i've been through this so many times. so many times, i've been lost in the forest, thinking what the hell, why don't i just quit this. but at the end of the day, i look back and say, damn it's all worth it.
i was once cold and freezing in the korean mountains, but when u're at the peak, u say, damn, i would do that again and again and again.
when i was studying alone in my stupid room for a levels. with nobody to assist me or help me or anything liek that, and when i look at my results slip and give my lousy CT that smirk of mine, yeah, it was all worth it.

SO, the bottom line is, though we might think something is tough now, at the end of the day, if you realise how it all fits in the grand scheme of things, it will be worth it in the end. after all, confucius once said that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. that can't be more true.

i'm quite cryptic ain't it. no? damn, i'd like to think i am. BUT anyways, it's monday, and before u know it, a week will pass, and it's back to friday again.
and then another week will pass.
and months will pass.
such is the transcience of life.
i can never say enough about the transcience of life. but come to think of it, i'm 20 years old. and it really does seem like quite a long time 20 years is.
only that my past 2 years were wwasted "protecting the nation" seriously
seriously! train me in infantry, post me to specialise in logistics, and ultimately, give me a job as manpower officer.
well done lah.


ok i'm going to sleep! so that i can wake up later :)

mervyn at 8/21/2006 04:52:00 PM

Friday, August 18, 2006

ain't no sunshine when she's gone.

it's been a long time since i've blogged here. it's nothing much, just that blogging to me is something i only do when i've got time. it's something therapeutic, something i do when i need to destress.

but the past week, i've not even had time to come online, much less blog. so yeah.

it's been a great week, to say the least. its been probably the best couple of days in my whole damn year. but as they all say, happiness is short-lived, and it flees without mercy.
somehow i think yr happiness quotient is like a bottle of ribena. you have only one bottle, and u can choose to drink it damn sweet and concentrated for 10 days, or you can choose to drink normal ribena for a month. whatever, i'm just talking nonsense.

but yeah, those were great, excellent memories. but yah that's about it. what can i do to stop time right? i mean, in the lake house, the people can fall in love 2 years apart with each other, so what is time? time sucks. it passes too slow when you want it to be fast, and it goes along too fast when you want it to slow down. am i seriously making sense? well, i'm not making much sense but well yeah, i'm in quite a screwed up mental state at this point of time.
all i wanna do is lie in bed and sleep. but time will pass, and soon, ii will be alright.
and the songs which i'm listening to don't really help much. but i can't really listen to hip hop now. what used to sound like music to my ears now sound like noise. hhaha. what the hell happened to me man.

at least i'll be playing football tomorrow in school. so it wont be that bad. physical exhaustion is always a good way to make your mind lose itself.

so yeah, what the hell right.

i've been quite deprived of sleep the whole week, but it's been all worth it. anyway,now i have all the time in the world to sleep. in fact, there's nothing i'd rather do but just to sleep. seriously, everything just doesn't do anything for me now. not a movie, not mos, nothing. as the song goes, ain't no sunshine when she's gone. it's not warm when she's away.

sighness. it's a different thing driving alone. it's not the same to sit in the cinema alone. its different eating alone. but i guess it's something to get used to until the next time. but time will pass, and seasons will change, and before you know it, we'll be able to go somewhere only we know.

but well, as the song goes, only the lonely know the way i feel tonight.

mervyn at 8/18/2006 04:19:00 PM

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

the morning after

what does it feel like to open ur eyes, and realise that it is the morning after?
when u open ur eyes, what is it u wake up to? are u woken up by the sounds of raindrops, or the sound of people talking, or by the constant buzz of your persistent alarm clock?
it all plays a part in the determination of your day. how it goes, etc.etc.


so ytd, ii had a nice little gathering at my place. it was quite pleasant, and it was nice to be able to see my frens and catch up with them once again. some people i've not seen for v long, some ppl, i see everyday, but whatever the case, its all good. i mean, there's not much to complain about. or rather, there shouldn't be anytihng to complain about. sometimes life is just like that.

have we ever sat down and asked ourselves what we want out of our lives? alot of people like to just go from hurdle to hurdle, unaware of where their road is leading them to. it's like they think of PSLE, and oh i must concentrate on PSLE to get to a good school. in secondary school, they take 10 subs, to keep their options open. after that, in JC, they are likely to take PCME or BCME, so that their options will not be closed either. and then they go to university, struggling to clear module after module after module. because they are unaware of what they want in life. life to them is just a series of hurdles which they have to clear. they are like the race horses put on a race track, unaware of the grand scheme of things, but just going whereever life leads them.

on the other hand, if you sit down, reflect, and think about where you need and want to be 10 years down the road, 20 years down the road. you can take control of your life. bring about a positive change. know where each individual step will take you. in that way, you will be much more aware of life. but then again, some people might argue that life is about uncertainty. its about going with the flow and going where it might take you.

but the choice, is ultimately yours. you can still keep your life under control, going tro where you want to go, and still have time to smell the flowers, still have surprises, excitement and novelty. it's just the setting of the rudder and the sail, but who knows what rainbows might occur along the way.

oh wells.
thought of the day.
have fun.

mervyn at 8/09/2006 04:47:00 AM

Thursday, August 03, 2006

does the sun ever miss the moon?

finally, i've set up my mixers.
its slowly fallling into place.

nowadays, life has become a vinyl record. it just spins and goes on and on. its no longer a smorgasboard of excitement. it's no longer anything worthwhile. its just a mundane mix of routine excitement designed to create a quick fix to a long term problem.
i wish i could travel back in time and do something differently. then maybe things wouldn't have turned out this way. maybe its just bad timing. or a case of ill-fate. whatever the case, it's like this and like that and like this, and nothing can change it.

i watched tokyo drift again. it's a no-plot, full of action movie. but the car stunts were absolutely fabulous. dangerous for any driver to watch, for you'd think you're driving a drift car after the show. but the cars were seriously done up quite nicely. cann't get any of that in singapore, with the traffic police all over the place. stiff uniforms on stiff bikes. designed to take the life out of us, when we're already overworked and overstressed.

sighness.
why doesn't life turn out the way we want it to be. some things could be much better. if only we could click it into place.
ah........................
sedatives exist for a reason.

ok.
the time traveller's wife is a brilliant book.
too much fairytale for reality.

goodnight.

mervyn at 8/03/2006 06:22:00 PM

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

viccissitudes

how many does a person need?

its a nice wednesday night, it's supposed to be a mambo night, but here i am, cuddled in bed, underneath my awesome quilt, preparing for a nice night with my book and me, and then off to bed.

somehow i became too tired to go out. i don't have much of that energy left. or maybe it just has to do with my lack of sleep. either way, it's just like that.

i'm quite disappointed of late. disappointed with myself, for making some wrong decisions, which i think have led me down this long slippery slope to where i am now. it's quite sad, but then again, you have to consider the inevitabilty of it all.

i'm quite a man of extremes. i drift from one extremity to another. there's no in between for me. its either i hate u or i like u. there's no such thing as neutral.
i also think i'm quite abit of OCD. but then again, i'm no trained psychologist.

sighs.
suddenly, my light at the end of the tunnel shut off.
bye.

mervyn at 8/02/2006 05:44:00 PM